Low self esteem can be very trying for children. They come to believe that they are valueless. These feelings can easily lead to depression and sadness, and sometimes they manifest in being aggressive or mean. So, what is a good definition of low self esteem, and why do so many children suffer from it?
Children naturally tend to feel they are not as good as others, unless a healthy self worth is fostered. This is partly because the nature of being a child means being dependent on others. What people around them think is quite important to them.
It is very easy for kids that are left behind, abused or alienated from their families or from social groups to develop a low self esteem. Other people's views become internalized so that the child believes in them and comes to put a low value on himself or herself.
After these wrong perceptions are assimilated, they are harder to remove. Simply moving the child to a healthier environment is no longer the only necessary step, because by now the perception has become the child's own. Sadly, many children that are moved to different environments tend to believe that they will be cared for as long as they keep up their "front", and that the new people in their lives will stop caring for them once they discover their true selves.
This belief often persists into adulthood and can blight a person's whole life. They may spend their time trying to cover up who they really are because they do not expect their real self to be accepted. Or, they might focus on self-sabotage to reinforce their tainted self value.
The best thing to do is to help children with low self esteem as soon as one can. Parents can seek help from teachers and together they can show the child that being different from other kids doesn't mean one isn't good.
It is good for children to know that others are interested in what they think and feel. Be on alert when you hear them talking in negative terms, either about themselves or others. If they do put themselves down, don't just tell them they are wrong because this is yet another negative to add to all of their bad feelings about themselves.
Maybe you can simply ask them if they are really feeling that. As an example, let's assume your child is telling you that her teacher mistakenly thought she had drawn a dog instead than a car, and the child followed that thought with a statement that she is terrible at art. Is her teacher's mistake really that bad that she is assuming she has no artistic skills? What would she say to her best friend if the same thing happened to her?
There is no need to judge a child's experience or tell them that what they feel is wrong. Try to make her see that her impression is not wrong, but also that there are many ways of looking at the same thing. This is the best way to teach children with issues of low self esteem that their way of seeing the world will not stop them from being loved.
Access some of the best self help books online. Our ever growing inventory includes a number of books that can help you learn about beat procrastinating.
0 comments:
Post a Comment